The topic of "dibs" has come up a lot recently. My friend Ciara and I joke about this a fair amount (mostly for fun and mainly directed at musicians and actors we haven't a hope of scoring) so I thought it was high time I looked at the rules behind this "dibbing". Ciara seems to have been dibbing for years, whereas it was new ground for me. But it does appear this is used as a genuine rule for scoring and more and more people are catching on to it. Hmmmm........
International Dibs Rulebook
This constitution is fully endorsed and sanctioned by the International Dibs-Calling Committee (IDCC). The rules listed below apply to the calling of Dibs, also known as “The Call”. Dibs may be made on any single person, whose sexual gender meets the preference of the caller. Dibs is called to reserve the target of the call (”the Target”) for the caller only, preventing others from approaching the Target for a set period of time. A Dibs call ensures a reasonable opportunity to seduce the Target without competition. These rules are definitive and binding.
Section I: The Basic Rules
Article 1: In order to call Dibs, the caller must pronounce the word “Dibs,” verifiable by at least one other person. The caller must also identify the Target in a reasonable manner (i.e. “I got Dibs on the butterface in the yellow g-string”).
Article 2: Dibs may only be called if the enactor (”the Caller”) has seen the Target in person. (photographs, digital images, etc. do not count). Dibs can only be called when the Caller is in line-of-sight (LOS) of the Target; Dibs cannot not be made if the Caller has already departed the Target’s location.
Article 3: The Call guarantees that no other individual, other than the Caller, may make any effort at hooking up with (seducing, courting, etc.) the Target for 30 days.
Article 4: Anyone disrespecting a legitimate Dibs call may be proclaimed a jackass by the community, and forfeits all honour. The Community may henceforth actively seek to destroy any sort of relationship the disrespecting citizen attempts with the Target, and may be attacked on sight.
Article 5: Dibs may only be called on a target who is officially single. In the case where the Target’s status is unknown, Dibs is in effect until information presents itself that clearly established that the Target is already spoken for.
Section II: Special Cases
These special exceptions to the above rules should be considered in the order presented; the case listed first will take precedence over any of the cases beneath it, when applicable.
Article 1: In the instance that the Dibs call was made after midnight, the 30-day period begins on the active day (the day in which one woke up).
Article 2: In the instance that the Caller is no longer interested in the Target, then the Caller may retract The Call. The Caller may not make a new Dibs call on the same target until another person calls Dibs on the target in question, and that call has elapsed. Dibs may not be surrendered to a specific person.
Article 3: In the instance that 30 days has elapsed since the Caller established Dibs, and the Caller has been unsuccessful in hooking up with the Target, then another individual may call Dibs on the Target. The individual whose time elapsed may not make a new Dibs call on the Target until after every potential candidate whom the original caller knows has either already called Dibs or has declined. If everyone has already called Dibs or declined, the slate is cleaned and anyone may call Dibs on the Target (except for the last caller, who must wait until at least one other person has called Dibs again). For purposes of this Article, “every potential candidate” includes only those people who were present when the original Dibs call was made.
Article 4: In the instance that the Target actively pursues a person who has not called Dibs, then the person the Target is after may submit to the Target’s desires, rendering the Dibs call irrelevant. For purposes of this Article, active pursuit will be determined only by those people present when the Dibs call was made; a majority vote will determine if the Target’s pursuit is “active”.
Article 5: In the instance that the Caller makes no significant effort at hooking up with the Target within 15 days of the call, then the Caller forfeits Dibs. Rules outlined in Article 2 are thusly followed.
Section III: The Free-for-All Rule (a.k.a. The Gang-Bang Rule)
Article 1: If a successful Dibs call has been made, the Caller may institute the Free-for-All Rule. In this case, all rules become obsolete, and Dibs may no longer be called on the Target until after the Target has hooked up with someone and broken up with them.
Amendments
Amendment I: The Lesbian Rule (a.k.a. Hot Dibs)
Contrary to its name, this Amendment is not gender-specific. If Dibs is called by someone of one gender (”Gender X”), then the Call may be overriden by someone of the opposite gender (”Gender Y”) by calling “Hot-Dibs.” This call is only legal if the Gender Y caller makes the override call within five minutes of the original Dibs call. All Dibs earned in this manner last only 15 days, not 30, and significant effort must be made within 7 days before this call becomes invalid (rather than 15).
Hot-Dibs can only be called by someone of Gender Y if the Target is the preferred sex of the Gender Y individual. In other words, Hot Dibs cannot be called simply to cock-block the original caller by someone of the Target’s gender.
Amendment II: Warring Factions
All rules within the Dibs Rulebook refer to a group of allied individuals (i.e. a group of friends, known as a “Faction”); the Dibs rules made by the Caller applies only to the Caller’s own Faction. Should this Faction recognize that Dibs was previously called by an individual in another Faction, the Caller’s Dibs call remains in effect. The Caller’s Faction may therefore attempt to sabotage the efforts of the opposing Faction’s caller.
As per Article 4 of the Basic Rules, all Factions are considered part of the Community. This establishes additional reinforcement of the rules governing a Dibs call.
Interesting. Use this information as you may my friends.
